You know it's not about free speech.

This last week has been a surreal experience. As much as I don't want to write about Chick-Fil-A ever again, I have to say one last word about it.

I don't know about you, but when Mike Huckabee tells me where to go, I go there! I do what Mike Huckabee says. After all, this dude definitely knows good fried chicken when he sees it. I only watch Huckabee after I've had a couple of good strong Long Island Iced Teas, usually from Applebees (be jealous of my hot suburban life). If I'm a little buzzed, I'll watch Huckabee and enjoy pointing out that he gained a lot of weight back. For some reason when I'm slightly drunk, I find that really funny. I like to point at him and make pig noises. I also enjoy imitating his tailor, who no doubt doesn't want to have to rebuild the Governor's entire wardrobe again.

When the former Governor and Baptist minister called for Chick-Fil-A appreciation day, you knew the people would turn out in droves. But what I loved more than watching the parade of Fox News viewers sitting in hours of traffic, by their own choice, was listening to their reason for being there: Free Speech.

According to those who went and supported Chick-Fil-A this last week, they did so to show their support for CEO Dan Cathy's right to free speech. The people I talked to about this seem to think that a CEO of a very profitable fast food company may be in danger of losing his right to free speech when he comes out and says he's opposed to gay marriage. Sorry, I should say he supports "traditional biblical marriage".



I know he means "one man, one woman" but he left out the concubines, slaves, his brother's wife should his brother pass away, and he left out that if his daughter were to be raped, she'd have to marry her rapist. Not to mention the payments received by the brides family in exchange for her, prearranged years in advance by the 2 families. These guys always miss out on the really good Bible stuff. The idea of marrying for love is actually a fairly recent thing.



Let's not forget, the whole controversy began because CFA gave over 5 million dollars of their corporate profits to "Pro-Family" causes.

"Pro-Family". Doesn't sound like it would ever hurt you does it? Almost sounds like a really good thing. Who isn't "pro-family"? I have a wife and 2 kids. I'm very close with my parents, and have a great relationship with them. I was close to my grandparents, and I stay close with my aunts, uncles, and cousins as much as I can. My idea of family is a lot like the family from the Cosby Show. It's a big group of people, who love and support one another. And let's face it, who didn't adore the Cosby Show growing up? I'll watch hours of Cosby Show reruns to this day. I still love it. So what could possibly be bad about "pro-family" activist groups?

Let me point something out about "Pro-Family" groups: These people are fond of saying that what they engage in is not hate speech. They say they support the biblical definition of marriage, again without the concubines, slaves, rape, incest etc. But they actively work against creating families that they don't like.

In fact one guy, Peter Sprigg of the Family Research Council (certified hate group) says he'd like to export homosexuals from the US. Doesn't exactly give you the warm fuzzies that the idea of "family" is supposed to conjure up, does it?


Exodus International, a beneficiary of Chick-Fil-A's Family Friendly Funding Spree (I made that phrase up) has spent nearly 4 decades claiming they can cure gays. News has just recently come out that founder Alan Chambers has now renounced that idea. After 40 years of not "curing" one gay person, and himself being married to a woman and still having gay attractions, I can imagine how that would shake your faith in the idea of repairative gay therapy. Chick-Fil-A may want invest somewhere else from now on. My suggestion is that they match the donations they made to Exodus International and give it to The Trevor Project. www.trevorproject.org

And lest we forget, the National Organization for Marriage. I find it odd that these guys aren't doing much to make divorce illegal. No, the 7 marriages between Rush Limbaugh and Newt Gingrich were all sacred and holy, and should not be tarnished by 2 men who are actually in love.

But, let's step back a second. These guys claim they're "pro family". Here's an interesting fun fact: the Ku Klux Klan doesn't claim to be anti-black. They claim to be pro white. They say that black people should be proud of their race, they should just be proud on a different continent. In a sense, the klan, those inbred sheet bearers, claim the same amount of tolerance as the Family Research Council. That's just something to ponder. Maybe puke about it later.









But, again, what was the rallying cry around this particular call for white meat power? (relax it's a joke, I'm not calling you racist.) Free Speech.

The folks who spent hours in traffic at the Chick-Fil-A, or Chick-Fil-Aters, said they were supporting free speech. So I'm sure we'll see them at Starbucks for Human Rights Campaign/GLAAD Appreciation day on August 7. I'm sure these fine folks will continue to support Google, Microsoft, Home Depot, JC Penny, Sears, and KFC. After all, Free Speech and freedom of religion are what it's all about.


These guys are pretty free with their own free speech. If you can say that on the air, and be exempted from paying taxes, I think your freedom of speech is safe. God help the rest of us.

That's what I really think.

Follow me on twitter @davelondonblog

More to come

There But for the Grace of the American Family Association....

We've all heard the saying "there but for the grace of God go I". If you haven't heard it before, well fuck you. You just read it. That's a little church humor. It's a phrase we can all understand, and relate to.

We've all looked at someone else's troubles and said to ourselves "at least I don't have that". It could all be worse.

I thought about that while reading, and aiding my comrades in a twitter fight with some people from the American Family Association. I find this organization fascinating. I've spent a good deal of time in places like Oklahoma and Kansas, and AFA, more specifically, AFR - American Family Radio, is very popular in that part of the country.

The marriage of politics and religion can't be more on display. Their particular brand of Christian Conservatism mostly focuses on reproductive rights and LGBT rights. They would like to end abortion, and convert all gay people to being straight, republican voting citizens of red states. They'd like all gays, lesbians, and those of us who support our LGBT brothers and sisters to go to a protestant church every Sunday, and decry the evils of liberalism, gay lib, and reproductive choice. They'd like all of us to renounce our sin, turn from our evil ways, and devote ourselves to heterosexual marriages, Bible study, suburban sprawl, child rearing, decent non-union jobs and voting for good God fearing conservatives in every election. Oh, and send them money. Don't forget that. The shit they say on AFR among other things got AFA slapped with the label "hate group" by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

They're an extreme bunch. You can't even really call them conservatives. True conservatives aren't the least bit concerned with what 2 grown consenting adults do in the privacy of their home. They don't give a damn if you're gay or straight, or bi, or poly amorous, or queer, or questioning, or even transgender. They just want to do away with the estate tax, since so many of us are going to pay it.

The 2 loudest voices from AFR are GM Buster Wilson, and host of Focal Point, Bryan Fischer.

I'd ordinarily include some video clips, but fuck them, I'm not doing that. You can visit their website if you care to see that, or you can go to www.rightwingwatch.org and sample them there.

The latest outrage from AFA is that Google began a campaign called "Legalise Love". AFA is already engaged in boycotts of other companies because of their support of marriage equality. But AFR's GM Buster Wilson seems to have stopped short of calling for a boycott of Google. Maybe because he has an Android? Who knows, but when he got pressed on it, Buster flipped out. He accused RWW of lying about what he said, which they didn't. A lengthy argument ensued on twitter, which I participated in. I made some snarky remarks to Buster, but didn't call him a name, no profanity, and no threats. I asked him: Since AFA is already boycotting so many other companies because of their support of gay rights, why not boycott Google?

He accused several of us on twitter of being hateful. Granted, some people did use some profanity, and one guy called him a cunt, but he wasn't really engaging in a conversation. He was just lashing out at being questioned. For his part he would say it was all lies. "Lies I tell ya, all lies!!".

Buster blocked me. Not a big loss. The guy doesn't like tough questions. I didn't call him anything during the twitter fight with RWW, but I am going to say Buster Wilson of American Family Radio is a damn coward.

The guy's gonna take on Google, for having the temerity to disagree with him and the other weird asses at AFR, but he can't answer a question from me?

I'm just a smart ass blogger for Chrissakes!! I'm nobody!!

And therein lies my fascination with American Family Association and American Family Radio. According to these guys, Jesus was rabidly anti-gay, pro-second amendment (seriously, Bryan Fischer actually said that), anti-abortion, and supports doing away with the capital gains tax. I'm not making this shit up. They say this stuff on the radio.

Their Jesus would kick down the infirm. He would demand a co-pay for life saving treatment instead of healing the sick out of compassion. He would be fine with stoning a gay man to death. He'd turn a blind eye to the murder of a doctor. Their Jesus quite frankly scares the fuck out of me.

Thank God their Jesus doesn't really exist.
I can't thank John Fugelsang enough for this quote. Thank you John!

The Jesus I pray to wouldn't do any of the vile things Buster Wilson and Bryan Fischer say He would do. I am a Christian. I went to seminary as a matter of fact. And most of my classmates would likely agree with at least some if not most of what Buster and Bryan say. I find that shameful.

Their Jesus would look at gay teen who just got their ass kicked for not looking butch enough and tell them "son, it's your fault for being pillow biter. now go enroll in exodus international, and start having sex with one woman for the rest of your life, or I'm sending your butt loving ass straight to hell!" Like from the movie Red State, scary shit. Thank God their Jesus is made up. The Jesus I pray to would pick that teen-ager up, hug him, wipe away his tears, heal his wounds, and tell him he's loved. He'd tell the closeted bastards who beat the kid up to take a whack at Him so long as one of them is without sin.

They would look at someone dying with an incurable disease in an emergency room and say "my tax dollars shouldn't be keeping you alive. pay for this yourself, you louse!" Or, they might look at a homeless person and judge them for all the bad choices that guy made. He probably did make some poor choices, but does he deserve your judgment?

They'll see all the suffering, some of which they have contributed to, and say, "my oh my. There but for the grace of God go I." And there's the heart of the real difference between the AFA Jesus, and the real one.

The real Jesus looks at unthinkable human suffering and says "There go I." (Matthew 25:40)

That's really what I think. Follow me on twitter @davelondonblog

More to come.